Writing is simple,but not easy.

May 21, 2010

Milestones -2

Milestone -1

Milestone -3

As he approached the second bend, he felt a strange sense of happiness that had eluded him for so long. Quite inexplicable really, but he did feel really good. He had nursed the little lamb to feel better, seemed so trivial, but the happiness felt so surreal.

On foot of the second bend he saw an old woman sitting quietly by the roadside. He noticed that she was not begging either. She just sat there with the lonely hills and silent trees. The drizzle had intensified a bit and it was getting chilly. He should have, could have, walked on.

But he didn’t

He squatted before the old woman and gestured pointing to the rain. The woman looked into his eyes without blinking. Age had shown visible signs of degeneration on her face. A face which told the stories of a thousand battles fought and lost mostly. A face which counted the moments left behind and the bliss to come…hopefully. They seemed to tell a story of lost hope.

Don’s eyes were moist...He was holding back his tears. But it was hard. There was a connect somewhere. She could see his heart, his pains…as if she took it upon her -as if not he, but she had gone through it all. As the drizzle became a light rain, maybe as an indication for Don to let go. He cried like he never did before, the floodgates of pain were flowing. There were so many angry waves from the past, some prejudiced, some misunderstood and some plain hurt.

Not a word was spoken. The old woman put her hand on his head. Her frail fingers wiped his tears. They seemed to say, it s ok to cry. Moments passed and the rain had eased. Don’s felt a sense of burden lift from his head. He felt like he had emptied the bucket. He was feeling fresh like the morning rain on the hills.

He searched his wallet and gave her some money. She looked at him and smiled faintly. Her trembling fingers returned the money in his shirt pocket. Don felt like a daft. He opened his bag back and gave her a woolen shawl. She was motionless, as if her breath waited for that one moment of kindness. Don never forgot the last look in her eyes…emptiness and hope fighting for a place. A silent tear struggled to stay in her eyes…before dropping to earth.

It was time for Don to move on. He had lost his past to gain a drop of the present.



Gyanban Thoughts - We dont know what we hold back.Somewhere somehow it will have to flow, you have to let go.Sometimes we hold back so much that we forget where we started storing it.lost deep inside, a hurt which never comes out but resides,a soul which cries to be heard,to be understood to be freed...so let go.

Don's journey continues through yet another bend.As he moves forward the hills and the roads throw new light , a new sight, a new hope for Don. But he is still loaded,and the burden is too much to let go too soon,he lugs his bag pack to the next hairpin bend.See where it leads...

Read Milestone -3

image courtesy :desktopnexus.com



17 comments:

  1. "He had lost his past to gain a drop of the present."

    fell in love with this line

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  2. Poetic.... all the lines were beautiful ...the last line being the best ....

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  3. beautiful...
    Your writing reminds me of Paulo Coelho...
    waiting for the next part...
    Do you know your neighbour?

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  4. His sorrows were lessened a bit :)
    Nice :)

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  5. Sensitive very sensitive! Touched the heart!U are indeed a gifted writer Mr Gyan Ban.will look forward to the next post :)

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  6. This post is loaded with emotions!!!loved every word!!!and this story is everyone's story....another gem from you!!

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  7. He had lost his past to gain a drop of the present.

    Bravo!!! bravo.... waiting for the next part!!!

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  8. I agree with LP on how your posts remind me of Paulo Coelho :D

    I love it when your words let the eyes do the talking, your characters say a lot about your observations in life.

    Cheers!!

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  9. "He had lost his past to gain a drop of the present."

    Awesome lines man.. Felt a sense of calm around me on reading this post.. :)

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  10. u r some writer arent u?... brilliant job my friend... do give me ur autograph the day u become famous...

    Cheers!
    Tavish

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  11. I agree..you are brilliant .

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  12. @Purba - sometimes the story throws up such lines..not me!

    @dmaniji - hey thanks tribesmate !

    @LazyP - you are most generous with your compliments.Thanks for appreciating.

    @Shilpa - well that time will tell..as of now he is on a inflection point in life.

    @Sudeshna - thanks a lot - am glad you liked it.

    @Magic Quill - Loaded indeed, Don is trying to deal with so much that has built up over time. -Thanks a lot for appreciating.

    @Sid - thanks mate.Next part is ready - you can check it out now. Cheers

    @Chatterbox -I think you are a visual writer too.Your scene constructs are reall nice. I guess all story tellers are visual...I try to be the same...I cant tell a story if I cant see it or be in it.Heart goes in first...mind come s in much later. Thanks for appreciating my work.

    @sushobhan - Well am so glad it did. Thank you.

    @Tavish -I - I dont consider myself a writer as yet,I dont kid myself. But someday maybe I ll get there...hope floats. I like the way you have constructed your latest story.Treasure hunt.

    @Kavita - thank you,you are most kind.

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  13. Its just getting better and better. Moving to part 3 now...

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  14. Life comes in Chapters or Milestones? However it does, we have to go thru it with as less baggage as possible, isn't it? You are brilliant!

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  15. The post is strikingly moving and hits one hard on the forehead. Unburdening the past with that moment was a classic stroke! Look forward to reading more. :)

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  16. Hey Gyan,
    the messages are intense but the pieces are such easy reading. Am enjoying this series..Don i svery unlike the way his name sounds. I like that too. GYanban Thoughts are your trademark and indeed a treat. Adds that extra dash ..:D good job!

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  17. @Roshmi - thank you for appreciating the story.

    @LonelyPlanet - Life comes in many ways, Milestones is just one such way.Thanks for appreciating the story and warm welcome to Scrambled Egg!!

    @coffeebeanmusings - I hope it didnt hurt your forehead too much.! Thanks for appreciating the story.

    @Vibhuti - Yes Don's real name is Dronesh, and it is a deliberate stance to call him Don- as you will realize later in the story. Thanks for taking the time to read the series.

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